Horses and Chariots of Fire

All Shapes and Sizes

2012-01-19T23:59:00.000+08:00

To be blessed is to have extraordinary friends who call my mother on her birthday, make plans to take her out for brunch and stress on what (food-related) present to get her.

To be blessed is to have my cousin brother preparing dinner with me in the kitchen and telling me enthralling stories about his childhood right after dinner.

To be blessed is to have a Math professor who took ten minutes out of precious class time to tell us that it is alright to feel stupid and to get us acquainted with math humor and math maturity.

To be blessed is to have a Geology professor whose ridiculous excitement for rain drops splattering on a muddy surface is beyond comparison.

To be blessed is to be praying for something as simple as a ride and to be receiving a call (offering a ride) fifteen minutes before the appointed time.

To be blessed is to be passed a sweet note from a beautiful sister in Christ with an invitation to our upcoming "secret club"...and to be given the nickname Schnazzlefrazz.

To be blessed is to have the dear company of my uncle and aunt who loved me as their own.

To be blessed is to have my thoughts, intentions and actions admonished by the Man Upstairs.

To be blessed is to have family and friends I miss everyday, and yet have family and friends right in my midst.

To be blessed is to be given the doubting of my own plan and the assurance of God's plan.

To be blessed is to have faith that God's hands are moving, and to be given the opportunity to witness it.

To be blessed is to have the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, guard my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).

God has been good.

True Identity (Not the Movie)

2012-01-03T22:58:00.000+08:00

So, the one who lost in the card game tonight would be in charge of the next dinner...and of course, I had to lose. Oy. But I am thankful that my aunt cooked tonight and only had me chopping garlic. I am sure everyone was relieved that we had a proper dinner instead of the instant noodles I was really planning on cooking. Double oy.

Rewinding back to the start of the day, we all woke up in the wee hours of the morning to run some errands on campus. The lady at the health center saw my face one too many times today and even remarked, "It's you again!" upon my third visit of the day. Oops.

In other awesome news, my long-awaited all-new good-lookin' floral-covered NIV Bible is finally in my hands. I suppose it is now a good time to work on becoming a woman. Because I almost puked a little typing that, I am clearly not one yet.

I will now come to an abrupt end.

"So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." -John 8:36

Faithwalking

2012-01-02T23:22:00.000+08:00

The last few days of 2011 and the first few days of 2012 have been highly eventful because God is always full of surprises.

The Faithwalkers conference in Omaha was nothing short of rewarding and I am thankful that God showed up in far too many ways -one of which was through the invaluable counsel a pastor-slash-geologist blessed me with. I am still reeling over God's goodness and gentleness.

The day after I got back from the conference, my relatives and I hit the freeway in search of something fun to do outside of Lincoln. Since the Strategic Air and Space Museum which we had initially planned to visit was closed for the holidays, we decided to embark on our own mini excursion in the Eugene T. Mahoney State Park. I concede that I have now developed a greater respect for Nebraska.

Night came and we invited a friend over for dinner. Once we were done scarfing down the exquisite food on the table, we decided to play a nifty card game for about two hours before toasting to the new year with cans of 7 Up. 'Twas a great night.

The morning of January the first arrived all too quickly and I jumped out of bed to head to church. I reminisced about the exact same moment last year -when I was running away from God- and marveled at the very moment I was in this year -when I was and still am running to God. There has been much He has seen me through. I am thankful. And more.

Afternoon rolled around and I fell ill. After much resting in the evening, I was still feeling unwell. I eventually felt better after a round of the card game with my relatives. It is really quite a sight to watch a family -mother, father and son- try their level best to sabotage each other. I am convinced that the most amusing part of every game is the unleashing of every player's true self.

It is now the night of January the second and we have just finished yet another round of the card game. The winner would have to prepare dinner tomorrow. Everyone is going to have to make do with instant noodles...as it is one of my favorites. Heehee.

Off to bed!

"Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom." -Psalm 145:3

Winter Warmth

2011-12-26T23:55:00.000+08:00

Today was quite like every other day since the break began. My uncle, aunt and I went to the mall for Boxing Day while my cousin brother chilled in the apartment. Two hours later, we picked up my cousin brother for a Vietnamese lunch in a car that was now filled with shopping bags. Haw haw haw. Right after lunch, we thought about what to cook for dinner and hit the supermarket for the missing ingredients. The first thing my rad uncle did was pick up a family-sized bag of chips and dump it into the cart. Then, he went on to fill the cart with a tub of cookies and cream ice-cream. I was a happy child.

Dinner turned out to be the highlight of the day again. My aunt demonstrated her excellent chicken-chopping skills and asked her son and me to follow suit. The chicken pieces became interesting shapes and sizes when she handed the knife over to us. It was a painful sight. But boy was it fun! With the wonderful supervision of my aunt and the careful cooking of my cousin, the food served was unbelievably good! They have certainly got a fan in me.

Tomorrow, I will be going for a four-day conference in the hopes of taking a few more steps forward in my journey with the Man Upstairs. I know He will not disappoint. He is Awesome like that.

T - 5 days 'til the new year...and new battles. Time to flail. And claim victory in Christ.

"You go before me and follow me. You place Your hand of blessing on my head." - Psalm 139:5

The Golden Year

2011-12-25T18:13:00.000+08:00

It is Christmas! The weather has been insanely marvelous ever since my relatives arrived last week and today is no exception. As I sit here on the toasty floor of my room, mulling over what Jesus is and listening to good music, all I can think about is how the year has been (as I am wont to do this time of the year...or, uh, most other times of the year).

2011 has been the most eventful year for me yet -by a very long mile. It started off with deliberate disobedience to God followed by immediate redemption by this same God. To plunge right into rock-bottom and to be made whole again just as quickly, the love of God had finally hit me left, right and center. The ugly times did not last, but the trying times did. Recognizing for the very first time who my horses and chariots of fire were, my lenses had never been clearer as I saw God's mighty hands take hold of my garbage, perform a little magic and hand me back gold. I cried, I grieved, I healed, I laughed, I danced, I read, I flew, I cooked, I learned, I grew, I fell in love with the Man Upstairs. It was quite a semester -definitely a tale for my future kids one day over a hearty meal of nasi lemak.

The ensuing months were too much of a blessing. God gave me the extraordinary opportunity to set foot on a few continents on planet Earth...with the Greats in my life...doing the most spectacular things. As if all that hadn't been enough to blow my socks off, God also saw to it that my cousin sister and I got to realize our ten-year-old dream of scaling a pretty bridge. My cup-eth had overflow-eth with tea-eth. This chapter of my life will always read like a fairytale in my book. The crazy love of my Author overwhelms me.

And finally, we reach part three of three in 2011. The semester which ended not too long ago had been painfully challenging -both academically and emotionally. I bade goodbye to two precious friends, had my pride necessarily thrown out the window, wrestled with my loony mind, got well acquainted with my f-f-f-flaws, realized that dreams change and lived in misery 75.28% of the time. Oy. Amidst all that, little life-changing moments like experiencing the sheer faithfulness of Christ and catching a glimpse of God's heart kept my spirits soaring high.

I concede with great shame (and bang my keyboard as I type this) that I had never had to seek help with understanding class material since a mutant lizard landed on me back when I was sixteen...and thus, always thought that I could handle things well on my own. This semester, God decided to spice my life up a little by vividly showing me that no, I cannot handle things well on my own...at all. It was a novel feeling to have to bring every single assignment, homework, quiz and exam before God but I pray I never stop doing this until the day I leave school. It was also a novel feeling to be so over the moon each time I could answer a question correctly. Every accomplished homework called for a little dance party (inside my mind). And God carried me from victory to victory throughout the semester despite my burgeoning fears and doubts. He is as real as real gets.

Looking back at how the semester had unfolded, I come back to the present moment and see that I am still standing at a crossroad. It perplexes me how God has seen me through so much and never withheld His best from me...and yet I find it pretty t-u-p-h to forge on despite knowing that He has got my back with my future. Unfortunately, I haven't gotten things figured out. But I am trying. He has got my back in this, too.

It has been a year of the worst of times and the best of times; a year of fulfilled dreams and changing dreams; a year of joy and more joy. 2011 has been wild. May 2012 not be so. Gulp.

"And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue His work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns." -Philippians 1:6

The Lincoln Musical

2011-11-27T23:36:00.000+08:00

Thanksgiving had been supremely marvelous. The past few days were, hands-down, the greatest days of the semester. I quiver at the immense goodness of the Man Upstairs. What a blessing to be reunited with the best of friends. The good times -involving intense card games, awkward high fives, late-night chats, "bimbotic" tendencies, jukebox moments, the reminiscence of older good times- were far too numerous to count. I could try describing just how precious those times were...but words would never do it justice. Now that the dearly missed friends are no longer here, the apartment feels emptier than usual even though nothing changed. I suppose when amazing presence comes, and then goes, the void becomes magnified.

Cheers to friends who light up my life. Cheers to friends who stay. Cheers to friends in joy and sorrow. Cheers to friends who are like no other. Cheers to friends like these.

I am thankful.

The Ride So Far

2011-11-23T20:08:00.000+08:00

November is almost drawing to a close. The month has been a month of many firsts. Well, actually...the year has been a year of many firsts. There have been bad firsts...and then there have been good firsts. Amidst all of that, I vividly see one thing that was and continue to remain constant: God's faithfulness. It has already been quite a ride and I am almost apprehensive about what December is going to bring. Snow, perhaps. Haw haw haw. (My sheer lameness is definitely to be envied.)

This semester, just like the last, has been challenging in its own way. God has been bludgeoning my pride into pieces, which need to be further ground into dust. I am thankful that He is chiseling away the parts that need to go, although I can't say that I am enjoying the bludgeoning process. Since the first day of the semester, not a day has gone by that I don't think about what I should walk away from university with. Degrees, and then some. God has been quick to remind me that I can count on His marvelous plans. Sadly, googilians of brain cells have still been sacrificed through unnecessary worrying and stressing out. Le sigh.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day and I am anticipating the arrival of two dearly missed friends from states up north as I type this. The apartment is as immaculate as it can get and as ready as it will ever be for the awesome visitors. My excitement for this mini-reunion of sorts got me hopping around with glee in the apartment earlier. There is really reason to be thankful. The good times are rollin'.

P/S: A shout-out to the horses and chariots of fire in my life. I encounter God everyday because of you. There is nothing more precious.

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" -2 Corinthians 5:17

Good Day #71349

2011-10-21T23:32:00.000+08:00

Today was quite an eventful day. After I was done with classes for the day, I played some tennis with a dear friend for an hour which somehow seemed like ten hours. It had been eons since I last played tennis, so it didn't take me too much effort to have way more hits off-court than in-court -both figuratively and literally speaking. My arms and legs ache as I type this. Woe is my under-exercised self. I hope to be able to play more of this in the coming weeks, although the looming issue of snow could pose a bit of a problem.

Post-tennis session, we went home and got prepared for the rest of the night's events: Diwali/Mooncake Festival and a musical performance by the Turtle Island String Quartet. The food was exquisite, the music was spectacular and the company was delightful. Praise God for His everlasting goodness.

And now, I shall embrace the weekend! May my level-o'-productivity increase by about 23.85%.

"He is no fool, who gives up what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose!" -Jim Elliott

Early to Bed, Early to Rise

2011-10-19T23:14:00.000+08:00

Fall break came and left. I spent a huge chunk of it sleeping in, doing homework, cooking, doing more homework and listening to boy bands from the 90's.

I am proud to say that I have been going to bed before midnight since the semester began -except for the unusual one or two precious nights that I stay up to chat with people from halfway around the world. But since my loyal friend by the name of Stress decided to drop by today, I think sticking to the habit of sleeping early is going to be a wee bit challenging. Aiyaya.

Signing out...fourteen minutes past my bedtime.

A Popcornful of Joy

2011-10-15T23:55:00.000+08:00

Today was a marvelous day. I jumped out of bed in the morning; very much excited to head to the Farmer's Market since it was going to be the last one for the year. Once my friend and I got there, we set out on executing our mission...while being distracted by the banana bread and a massive bag of popcorn we decided to buy along the way. The highlight of my morning, aside from accomplishing our tiny mission, was the conversation I had with a friend we bumped into at the Market. Words to remember: "Go for it. We all die in the end." Highly encouraging, I tell you! (No, really. Pardon my being sarcastic about being sarcastic.)

Afternoon came and we walked back home in the most beautiful weather. I munched on popcorn some more and worked on getting some things on my to-do list cancelled, like doing laundry, and reading, and uh, eating more popcorn. Oy.

Fast-forward to the evening and I was in church having quite a blast. It was the annual Harvest Fall Festival and the dessert entrees for the Dessert Competition just about made my night. What had really made my night was square dancing in a dress which flowed to the ground and in the company of great friends. A non-Justine experience, I must say. But a fantastic one. God is good.

Oh, Sharks!

2011-08-01T23:18:00.000+08:00

Last night, I had an intense dream involving a massive shark and a few insane dudettes who were curious to know what it felt like to be eaten by said shark. Oy.

In other less exciting news, the U.S. of A. is upon me this weekend. Double oy!

And as always, God has been ever faithful. Cheers to the Man Upstairs!

Wiping Waves

2011-07-20T23:58:00.002+08:00

Today was a tragic day. Just kidding. It was fantastic!

I jumped out of bed this morning and left to meet up with two precious college friends -one of whom I had befriended just when I had closed my college chapter and she had just opened hers.

Post-outing, my mother dropped me off at the orthodontist I had been going to (since I was twelve) for a check-up. When I was called in the room of doom, I handed him a shiny pack of peanut butter cookies from the States but it did me no good. In the end, he had my tooth sawed a little for the second time throughout my light-metal years. And then he made a comment about my wisdom tooth... Oh dear!

Post-appointment, my father came back from work and we all left for some delicious German sausages in belated celebration of my father's birthday. After much hinting on my part, my parents finally allowed me to get behind the wheel for the ride back home. It is certainly, and sadly, a truth universally acknowledged that my driving skills are close to non-existent...and as I drove I thought about the times the car and I had one too many close shaves. But God was always near and moved my hands and feet at just the right moments. I am happy to report that my parents and I got back home in one piece. Or three pieces, more like. Ordinary news, but big things can happen in the littlest moments. And I praise God for His great protection that never takes a break.

With less than a month back home, my restlessness has been fluctuating in the most uncool manner. But God has been wiping the giant waves of discouragement with a supersize killer wave of encouragement from the people He has placed in my life. God is mighty cool like that. Huzzah!

Tomorrow, I will still lack sleep. And perhaps a little bit of blood. But not God's love! I am most definitely looking forward to the day. And should most definitely head to bed now.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." -Romans 15:13

The Big Blessing

2011-07-19T23:50:00.011+08:00

In the words of a sister-in-Christ, God has been blessing my socks off. Australia was a complete blast. Seeing my beloved brother and cousin sister had been more than enough, but God further blessed us with making sure our ten-year-old dream of scaling Sydney Harbour Bridge came to pass...and enabling us to be part of a mega-huge worship concert...and providing the most exquisite food during every meal...and being the very center of our conversations...and giving us joy like no other. The good times were beyond plentiful! And the good times are still rollin'.

God's goodness never fails to blow me away each and every time. I don't know how much more blown away I can be, but I reckon...a whole lot more. When God blesses, He blesses big-time. And if I am rid of the flaw of being consumed by my circumstances when the going gets tuph, I can see that not a day goes by without His blessings. I know that with all my liver though. God is good.

P/S: Feeling a little giddy now all thanks to having this song on replay and the insane spamming that's occurring over at Facebook between the dearest of friends.
PP/S: A-hunga-hunga-hunga-hunga!
PPP/S: I repeat, a-hunga-hunga-hunga-hunga!

Everlasting Future

2011-06-21T16:11:00.000+08:00

One day...

I will be with the One I love,
With unveiled face I'll see Him;
There, my soul will be satisfied,
Soon and very soon.

One day.

A Time for Time

2011-06-20T23:28:00.000+08:00

Today was a very productive day. Did some eating, some packing and some planning. Tomorrow will be slightly bittersweet as I leave very precious people to see equally precious people. The daunting thought that my time back home is running out has been plaguing my mind. But my times are in God's hands. And His timing is beyond perfection.

My hands are going to be pretty full tomorrow. Time to call it a night.

Honored Men

2011-06-19T23:13:00.002+08:00

Today was a wonderful yet tiring day. I'm glad I finally got to spend some time with my father towards the end of the night. He is my pride and my joy. Praise my Heavenly Father for my earthly one. It is more than an honor to honor the gentlemen in my life -both in Heaven and on earth. Indeed, I lack nothing in the perfect Dad Upstairs whom I belong to. Just need to remind my forgetful self that every now and then.

“Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise. -Ephesians 6:2

Room to Chat

2011-06-18T23:23:00.000+08:00

Today was a little like yesterday. The first half of the day was spent at home and time moved really slowly...then evening came and time moved way too fast for comfort. Tomorrow is going to be yet another long day, but a good one! Praise God for wholesome conversations.

I am so very spent.

Over and out.

Time to Hit the Breaks

2011-06-17T23:55:00.003+08:00

Woke up a little earlier than usual this morning to have breakfast with my mother and two dear friends. I had initially feared that there would be awkward silences sometime throughout breakfast but boy was I wrong. It always warms my heart to see my friends conversing with my mother...non-stop. Har har.

When I came home, I spent several hours working on little projects...one of which nearly made me pop a vessel. Patience really is a virtue.

Evening came and I went for fellowship. Right after that, I dashed off to the high school reunion because it had already begun two hours earlier. It was a delight to catch up with high school friends I hadn't seen in eons. The only thing which wasn't so delightful was driving at the right lane of the road for the second time since I got back and not realizing it at all until it was pointed out -with fear- by the friend in the car. Oh dear.

Tomorrow might be a bit like today. I think the warning sign to slow down is flashing rather forcefully. I am looking forward to next week.

Life's Pleasantry

2011-06-16T23:01:00.000+08:00

Today, I had a very pleasant day doing really pleasant things. And now, I shall have a pleasant sleep.

Taste and see that the LORD is good. Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in Him! -Psalm 34:8

Past Blast

2011-06-15T23:51:00.003+08:00

Today was quite an eventful day. After exchanging primary and high school tales with a dear friend over brunch, I came home and decided to rummage through my drawers out of boredom...and immediately got blasted back to the past. Reading through the diary I had written in back when I was in high school added fuel to my trip down memory lane as well. If Past Justine were sitting right next to me as I read it, I would have liked to choke her at some parts...and hug her at other parts. It is quite a feeling to read the many pages penned down by my past self and realize how much I have changed and how much I have not. It is an even greater feeling to experience God's faithfulness beyond the written words and see how He was as faithful then as He is now. My particular favorite entries had been the one with the poem about my laziness and how I was going to screw up the upcoming exam...and the one ending with the disclosure of my need to pee since the start of the entry. A whole lotta wisdomful stuff in there, I tell you.

Evening came and I decided to watch a locally-produced dramedy as it was recommended by a friend who literally rolled on the floor laughing while watching it. The movie's sheer ridiculousness did not disappoint, although I did not roll on the floor laughing while watching it.

Tomorrow will be a bit of an interesting day. I am looking forward to the joys that God will bring tomorrow. He is always good.

The Maker

2011-06-14T22:55:00.000+08:00

Today, I had a pretty good afternoon spending time with two jolly good friends who probably made more sounds than the action-packed movie we were watching. I also had a pretty good evening spending time with my mother at the night market and with sisters in Christ at the church.

It has finally dawned on me, perhaps a little too late, that if my entire Summer back home was spent on the internship I was so bent on pursuing instead of spending time with precious people God has blessed me with, I probably would have missed out on all these daily little joys that light up my every day. It's true that God takes something good out of our grasps to replace it with something great and beyond compare. I am glad He gives and He takes as He knows best...because He loves best; hard a lesson as it is to learn sometimes.

As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts. -Isaiah 55:9

Happy Worm

2011-06-13T23:35:00.000+08:00

Today, I felt the joy I usually derive only from reading. And what a marvelous joy that was. It has been a while. I almost forgot what it felt like. But only almost.

The book calls.

Over and out.

Done Some

2011-06-12T23:09:00.001+08:00

Read some, drove some, ate some, watched some, learned some.

God is good.

Being Chiseled

2011-06-11T23:52:00.002+08:00

Today, I had the loveliest time catching up with my precious younger cousin sister at the mall...and the oddest time donning a Greek-like dress at a country/cowboy-themed dinner because I didn't get the memo. Oy, man.

Back to reading...and to working on my infuriating self. I suspect there is a tragically great deal of chiseling God still needs to do on me. I wish it weren't so, but it is.

"Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust Him, and He will help you." -Psalm 37:5

A Good Ol' Time

2011-06-10T19:40:00.001+08:00

Spent most of my time today with family -both in the real world and in the virtual world- and with a book. Good times? Oh yeah.

The Present

2011-06-09T23:33:00.000+08:00

Today, I had two people blow-dry my hair at the same time. Yep.

That, and I had the pleasant opportunity to speak at lightning speed once again while catching up with three splendid high schoolmates over Frappucino. To say I had a great time would be a bit of an understatement. I had the greatest of times. Just like I did yesterday, and the day before yesterday, and the day before the day before yesterday -well, you catch my drift.

I thank God for each day that comes. He is indeed my Jehovah Jireh.

Conk

2011-06-08T22:47:00.002+08:00

Today was good. Really good. Really.

Off...to...sleep...

Ordinary Unordariness

2011-06-07T23:33:00.001+08:00

Woke up this morning feeling massively tired only to realize that I had slept for more than twelve hours. Oy. Left for a late lunch with two awesome high schoolmates and had a hilarious episode on the road with a cop car. Then, met up with yet another two awesome high schoolmates for the night market only to bump into a couple of other high schoolmates and high schoolmates' mothers. And then, caught up with my splendid ex-Sunday School teacher over dinner and shared my hopes and dreams with her as she shared the joys and pains of adulthood.

Tomorrow will be yet another day I am looking forward to as I spend it with people whom I've had the delightful privilege to know for at least a decade.

I pray I never tire of this.

Time to walk the talk. Over and out.

The Blasted Summer

2011-06-06T23:37:00.004+08:00

Europe was nothing short of marvelous, especially the ice-cream which deserves a special mention. The elderly people who were in the tour group were nothing short of marvelous as well, and taught me a lot about aging gracefully. Despite the European souvenir I received in the form of a rash, a cold and a bad throat, I am immensely grateful my parents brought me along for the trip. Being the ingrate that I was, I deserve quite a bit of spanking.

Today was an especially brilliant day as I managed to spend breakfast, lunch and dinner with the dearest of friends -all of whom I hadn't been able to catch up with in months and even years. It overwhelms me just how much joy can be derived from spending undisturbed quality time with loved ones. I don't know why I never saw it before, but I see it now: People are such precious blessings. Dinner tonight really blew my mind because all four of us had gathered at the mamak stall for the sake of an unsuspecting mini-high school reunion and left being encouraged and prayed for. God renders me speechless sometimes. And I mean that in a good way. The best of ways, really.

Through all the ups that I've been experiencing, there have been many downs, too. Seasons of drought, I would regard them as. And I always hope that they are short-lived. The peace I receive that transcends mere human understanding and which comes from Above helps during times like these. I'm thankful that God is faithful even when I'm not and even at my ugliest. What an Awesome God. Man!

Praying for my restlessness to come to...rest. I know the glorious Man Upstairs is at work.

My heart has heard You say, "Come and talk with Me." And my heart responds, "Lord, I am coming." -Psalm 27:8

Bon Voyage

2011-05-20T21:12:00.002+08:00

Had a memorable day today meeting up with a friend I had never met before but had been in contact with for the past several years all because my mother met said friend at a bakery one fateful day and decided to introduce us because he was pursuing Aeronautical Engineering, a field I was greatly interested in at the time. And listening to a thirty-minute long debate on the pros and cons of Facebook by said friend and yet another dear friend. Haw haw haw.

T - 4 hours and 48 minutes until take-off. Cheers to God for His goodness and grace. And to the wonders of family and friends!

While on Earth

2011-05-19T23:09:00.000+08:00

Today kicked off on a slightly rough note when my father brought back a form for me to fill in for the third time and I failed yet again to stamp my thumbprint on it despite practicing numerous times on a blank piece of paper. Both my thumbs have some serious issues with ink and paper. Oy. Frustrated, my father finally decided to bring me to the office to settle this thumb issue once and for all. Less than a minute later, we were done. Phew.

And then the day got marvelous after that. I had the glorious opportunity to meet up with three other high schoolmates for lunch. We had sat at the eatery for two solid hours until the power at the place decided to die, which was our cue to leave. It was a splendid afternoon spent with dear friends who cracked me up from the moment I left my house until the moment I got back home.

Praise God for the joy that comes from Above.

"Sorry, I'm not in the Milky Way right now." -A possible response to high school reunion invitations in the future by a gem of a friend

To Remember and to Forget

2011-05-18T23:30:00.000+08:00

Today was yet another blessed day spent with two dear high schoolmates at the age-old eatery by our school, the mall and the night market. Watched a chick flick which was a tad bit silly, gushed over the awesomeness of such good food and witnessed two friends physically assault each other at every chance they got. Just the best of times.

And just a spiritual note to self of God's amazing grace:
"And I will forgive their wickedness, and I will never again remember their sins." -Hebrews 8:12

My Summer So Far

2011-05-17T23:50:00.000+08:00

Had a brilliant day today meeting up with my English teacher of seven years (albeit for a short while), having tea with my dear aunt-slash-ex-babysitter and hanging out at the mall with my hip parents. Did a bit of swimsuit-shopping but mostly did a lot of eating. And driving. And walking. And laughing.

God is good.

Same Ol' Same Ol'

2011-05-16T21:52:00.000+08:00

Today was an insanely brilliant day spent with my cousin brother and three other collegemates. Although we were technically out for twelve hours and I drove on the right side of the road once (among many other road blunders), I can't remember the last time I had felt such a familiar joy merely by doing the same things with the same people at the same places. It has been quite a while and being able to hang out with each other just like old times was the absolute bomb. Yo.

Traffic was bad. Conversations were nonsensical. Popcorn was delicious. Friends were amazing.

Felt as if I had never left. And what a great feeling that was.

You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in Your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. -Psalm 139:16

What A Woman

2011-05-15T23:50:00.001+08:00

Had an amazing time at church, a splendid lunch with a splendid friend, a fantastic Japanese dinner with fantastic relatives and...the best conversation with my (best) mother yet -although this is really saying something because there have been many great ones.

God is all sorts of Awesome. And so much more.

The Food Trip

2011-05-14T23:23:00.000+08:00

Just got back from a one-day trip to Malacca with four hyper dudettes. The highlight of the trip had been queuing up for two solid hours just to have satay for dinner. And analyzing the nasty concoction in the drain as we queued. Yep.

Time to crash. Very much excited for church tomorrow!

A Little More Conversation

2011-05-13T23:51:00.001+08:00

Today was very much a people- and food-filled day. One that involved family, unimates from Nebraska, a dear schoolmate, a Patrick Star straw and a driver's license scare by my father who wanted to get even at me because I had popped back home unannounced. Oy.

Tomorrow will be yet another people- and food-filled day. Got a feeling that most days this summer back home would be so. Righteous.

Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow (from a doxology). I am slightly overwhelmed by His many blessings that I don't quite know what to do with myself. I know He will help me figure out what it is He wants me to do in His insanely perfect timing. But as for the moment, I am receiving them with joy. God is good. And ain't that the biggest understatement in existence. Haw haw.

"...go..." -Matthew 28:18-20

(Per)mission to Chill

2011-05-12T18:29:00.000+08:00

I woke up this morning with a huge grin on my face all thanks to my dearly missed bolsters which accompanied me in my sleep. After lunch, which also made me grin widely, my parents and I left for my father's appointment with his chiropractor. My mother then made the chiropractor examine my upper torso since she had noticed how my right shoulder appeared to be lower than my left one. Oy. I eventually left with the knowledge of two arm exercising techniques and a pair of (cool) corrective slippers. Interesting stuff.

When we finally got back in the evening, I had the pleasant opportunity of Skyping with my brother and we blabbered for forty-five minutes about churches around the world, food hygiene, flying for God, cultural differences, KFC's Double Down and vacation plans. The highlight of the entire video conversation was the part where he showed me the sole of his lovely foot and I showed him one side of the pair of corrective slippers I had just gotten. Fun stuff.

Somehow, as the day progressed, the plans I had written down as mental notes long before setting foot on Malaysian soil got bludgeoned into irreparable pieces. Although I decided to give them to God just last night, I tightened my grip on said plans all too quickly when I couldn't see how the new ones would be beneficial based on my very limited understanding. There was and maybe still is much I fear when a NASA-funded Martian research project and an internship for a newspaper get dangled right in front of me one moment and immediately get snatched out of my grasp the next. And become replaced with vacation plans instead.

But God knows best and He sees the bigger picture I cannot yet see. I am not too sure if He really wants me to spend my time back home traveling -in the presence of phenomenal people, no less- instead of investing a little in my future, or perhaps something else entirely. But I think He had all the seasons of my life laid out even before I was born. 'Tis the season to travel, I suppose. Clearly, I need to learn how to chill.

Looking forward to...each day that comes!

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11

Land of the Good Food (and People)

2011-05-11T23:08:00.002+08:00

Back home.

The dinosaur bottle a friend and I had gotten from Universal Studios in Singapore exactly a year ago is staring back at me with unnecessary rage as I type this in my dearly missed bedroom.

Might implode from containing my excitement in this post.

Cheers to the Man Upstairs!

I say again, cheers to the Man Upstairs!!!

I Am Second*

2011-04-08T23:49:00.002+08:00

God is up to something, as He always is. And this blog is getting in the way, among many other things. For that, I shall take a hiatus and blog when God allows or tells me to do so. Taking a time-out with the first half of one of my most favorite Psalms close to mind.

O Lord, You have examined my heart
and know everything about me.
You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do.
You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, Lord.
You go before me and follow me.
You place your hand of blessing on my head.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too great for me to understand!
I can never escape from Your Spirit!
I can never get away from Your presence!
If I go up to heaven, You are there;
if I go down to the grave, You are there.
If I ride the wings of the morning,
if I dwell by the farthest oceans,
even there Your hand will guide me,
and Your strength will support me.
I could ask the darkness to hide me
and the light around me to become night—
but even in darkness I cannot hide from You.
To You the night shines as bright as day.
Darkness and light are the same to You.
- Psalm 139: 1-12

*borrowed from a for-God project as seen on YouTube

Until next time! Cheers to the Man Upstairs.

Love Like BOOM!

2011-04-07T23:42:00.000+08:00

Things which made my day today:
1. Chatting with an awesome friend first thing in the morning.
2. Psalm 139!
3. Mail. Lovely mail.
4. The company I had for the all-you-can-eat Waffle Man buffet, and not so much the waffles itself.
5. The death of my controlling (yet unfinished) to-do list and its burial in the dumpster.
6. The revelation that I just might explode from extreme happiness when I see God. It is both a scary and exciting prospect but I look forward to it with great delight!
7. Watching my mother eat her paus on Skype.
8. Watching my dear apartmentmate Skype with her adorable parents.
9. The sheer insanity of God's love and immaculate timing.
10. The rain.

"We forget that God never had an identity crisis." -Pr. Francis Chan

Rockin' Numbers

2011-04-06T23:00:00.000+08:00

Today, I dropped off the form to officially become both a Geology and Mathematics major. Shortly after that, I panicked. Then I decided to stop panicking. And before I knew it, I was panicking again. And now I have stopped panicking. I don't know how God is going to use an odd medley of rocks + numbers + Justine, but that Man up there is pretty diabolical. So I shall not fear!

Oh man.

Note to self: Jehovah Jireh!

(dance)

2011-04-05T23:50:00.000+08:00

Today was yet another (surprise surprise) fantastic day! My Geology professor briefed us a little on the upcoming field trip around Nebraska, the English subject I had taken back in college got approved for credit transfer to the university, the dreaded Geology test ended up being an open-book and take-home test, double majoring in Geology and Math might come to pass, had chicken curry for the third consecutive day, finally walked through the parentheses sculpture on campus and the sun shone until the later part of the evening.

Tomorrow will be no less fantastic, this I am sure of.

The awesomeness of God blows my mind. Yo.

"We get to spend eternity hanging out and praising You." - Jeremy Nicholson

An Overflow

2011-04-04T23:01:00.004+08:00

Today was a very blessed day, as is every other day. I woke up to an encouraging email reply from a dear uncle which made my day. With only one class for the day, I struggled to walk against the insane wind and try not to get lifted up -though it would be sweet if that actually happened. Although my face didn't look too happy with my hair mercilessly smacking it every nanosecond, I was internally overjoyed. Because the torrential wind today had felt absolutely incredible.

I had also invited a precious friend from both my Geology classes and yet another precious friend over for a Malaysian dinner tonight and so I got to chopping certain food items in the afternoon before launching into my homework. Evening came and I began cooking. Needless to say, all three of us had a splendid time talking not only about the sort of things you share with someone of a different culture, but we also got to talking about oil rigs (where she works at back at her hometown), mental disabilities, books and bridesmaid dresses. Well, all the diabolical and deep conversations transpired between the two of them while I mostly listened...and ate. Oy.

Other than that, many bits and pieces of the day (mostly people-related) filled my heart -and tummy. My cup hath runneth over with implicit love from Above. God is good(eth).

No one engaged in warfare entangles himself with the affairs of this life. -2 Timothy 2:4

Xuan Ze

2011-04-03T23:49:00.002+08:00

Today, the better half of the day was spent in the kitchen with three awesome dudettes as we attempted to make chicken curry lasagna and successfully salvaged it when the top layer became charcoal...twice. Teamwork begets rather delicious food.

Then, I glanced at my to-do list and began to freak out when God reminded me that worrying ain't gonna add a single moment to my life. And that He has this covered. So I decided to quit worrying and proceeded to spend the rest of the day in fellowship with incredible brothers and sisters in Christ over dinner. And then delve into a Korean romantic dramedy and several other insanely romantic (Read: cheesy) Cantonese songs all thanks to the hilarious company I had. Needless to say, I was engulfed by too much cheesiness in one night. But it was good to be engulfed in it with two other dear friends.

I am not quite looking forward to the coming week and all the challenges that are heading my way, but God is bigger than any of them. So psh! I will survive.

The Extraordinary One

2011-04-02T23:43:00.000+08:00

Today was an extraordinary day. Just because.

Love is patient,
love is kind.
It does not envy,
it does not boast,
it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others,
it is not self-seeking,
it is not easily angered,
it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects,
always trusts,
always hopes,
always perseveres.
Love never fails.
But where there are prophecies, they will cease;
where there are tongues, they will be stilled;
where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

- 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

Worshiping an extraordinary God of extraordinary love. Life is good in the God lane.

"It's quite peculiar..."

2011-04-01T23:38:00.003+08:00

Today, I woke up to a lovely (and slightly horrifying) note saying, "Good morning, my sweetie butter cup honey marshmallow pie!" Although I was and still am unable to comprehend such affectionate terms, I know I am loved. And God is good.

Today, I woke up to the sound of tape sealing the entrance to the apartment door by a very clever friend in conjunction with April Fools' Day. I laugh out loud.

Today, the glorious sky looked like a portrait beautifully painted by an equally -if not more- beautiful Painter. The blindingly white clouds were probably edible.

Today, I had exquisite Japanese food in the presence of amazing company. I am thankful. And way too stuffed.

Today, I told five different people at five different times of the day about my chosen topic for the Geology paper...in pure excitement. Uh...

Today, I thought the day was quite peculiar. And I enjoyed it very much!

P/S: Dedicating my 602nd blog post to the Man Upstairs -my only living constant.

Kantoi

2011-03-31T23:57:00.001+08:00

Before yesterday, I had an excellent plan. Yesterday, the excellent plan shriveled up and died due to a very hilarious misfortune. Today, I am going to trust Plan G -the best plan ever.

In other news, yesterday and today were massively productive days. Days that involved a speech, grocery shopping, nail polish-hunting, an ice-cream float, a bag of Lays, the channeled scablands, mail, Geology professors, Facebook madness and God's love.

And now, I am on a quest to vanquish my vampire. Die, vampire, die!

Zeet Zeet!

2011-03-29T22:34:00.003+08:00

Geology is beginning to excite and scare (the living daylights out of) me at the same time. I fear!

Red Passion tea tastes amazing.

The SpongeBob SquarePants hoodie has now become my most favorite piece of clothing...after pajamas, that is.

Praise the Man Upstairs for people; family and friends alike.

That is all.

God is good!

The sun rises and the sun sets, then hurries around to rise again. -Ecclesiastes 1:5

Hey Yeo

2011-03-28T14:52:00.001+08:00

"Yes, I just remembered what I wanted to tell you. I Skyped with your Koko [brother] a few days ago. He was laughing and saying that the both of you sent a card to each other WITHOUT informing each other and both received from each other the card at the SAME TIME...he said it was very funny."

- My mother

Massively proud to be a Yeo!

Living Loved

2011-03-27T23:50:00.000+08:00

The mission-slash-service trip to Des Moines, Iowa was, in one word, God-filled. Those three days were days of many firsts for me and I am immensely glad that I went. Today was no less of a brilliant day! Spring break has been nothing short of awesome. Life is good. God is good. Aloe vera plant is good.

Cheers to the Man Upstairs!

K to the C

2011-03-23T23:23:00.001+08:00

The short but very fruitful trip to Kansas City, Missouri was quite the bomb. Since I have developed a fond liking (and obsession) for lists, I shall mention several awesome things we got to do there:

1. Have Korean, East African, American, Chinese and Japanese food in the two days of vacation. And all of them were nothing short of exquisite.

2. Visit an art museum and a train museum.

3. Observe very rad buildings at Downtown and at the Plaza.

4. Try frozen custard that had too much yum. And chocolate.

5. Hunt for tea in the middle of the night when most shops were closed.

6. Star in an intense game of Monopoly with four other loony dudettes.

7. Shop at an insanely huge oriental supermarket that was the ultimate Asian food haven.

8. Visit a cultural market place that had a very quaint tea place with an incredulous variety of flavored tea leaves.

9. Participate, or rather, listen to very interesting conversations -both on the road and over good food.

10. Marvel at the beauty of God's works.

I leave for yet another state tomorrow with a number of brothers and sisters in Christ for a small mission trip. This would be my first mission trip and I honestly don't know what to expect, but I know God's best will come forth. And now, I shall retreat to my chamber and answer the fervent cries of my comfortable bed.

Until Sunday!

Time for Spring

2011-03-21T23:08:00.003+08:00

Today was the first day of Spring break. And it was brilliant.

I got to sleep in for the first time in quite a while and boy did it feel good! Then I got started on my Geology lab work which required me to identify ten aphanitic igneous rocks based on their respective chemical compositions on the Total Alkalis-Silica (TAS) plot. (Point to note: I wish I had made all of that up...but no, the lab question paper made all of that up.)

Shortly after that, I got started on making dinner for three awesome dudettes and yours truly. A little after dinner, I went down to check the mail and saw a very epic postcard from my brother which just about made my week. I actually chuckled and laughed out loud all the way up the stairs back to the apartment, with my heart leaping with joy. (Though he will never know of such a horrific reaction by sister Yeo.)

The great day ended with all nine of us heading to the theater to watch a movie whose titular character was a talking lizard. And a shrewd one at that. Nifty stuff.

Tomorrow, I will be heading on a two-day sojourn with three extremely excitable dudettes in search of good food...and good museums! Exactly six hours 'til we hit the road.

A Geology Poem

2011-03-20T17:12:00.001+08:00

Your eyes are like trace fossils,
Your hair is like mid-ocean ridge basalts,
Your body is like a subtropical high pressure belt,
But mostly you are like a zoophycos...I don't get you.

- Jeremy Yeo the Awesome

P/S: If you do not get the hilarity of the poem, may it be an inside joke between my brother and me (and those who know what zoophycos is) forever.

Har har har.

An Epic Proportion

2011-03-18T23:47:00.003+08:00

Today, I flew a plane.

God is good.

P/S: My brother had also created a superbly ingenious yet senseless poem on Geology, which I will share soon...once my adrenaline starts to mollify.

PP/S: Can't quite describe the feeling of having the controls (albeit for a short while) in the cockpit and sharing the indescribable joy with marvelous friends. I am at bliss!

PPP/S: The view from the pilot's seat looks pretty spectacular.

Om Nom Nom

2011-03-17T23:50:00.002+08:00

Broke three nails today and almost wept buckets (not really).

Had a beautiful little baby chew on my thumb numerous times today.

The Geology exam this time around had gone way better than the first one.

Gave up my cares to God for the googilianth time.

On to my speech outline!

And then it's time for some much-needed crashing.

Stress-less

2011-03-16T13:12:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, I came back from campus to a couple of grown men remodeling the balcony and Joe the bee buzzing in the apartment. A few hours later, we had a new green balcony and Joe the bee still buzzing in the apartment. At night, the awesome friend arrived and the welcome feast prepared by a precious friend and yours truly was quite a success. All of us were insanely full and probably still are. Oy.

Today, I am stressed out big-time when I have no reason to since God has told me way too many times that He has got all my worries covered. So I will try my best to do away with the stress.

No stress! No stress, I tell you!

I may be failing at doing away with the stress but I will keep trying. Although this stresses me out a little bit as well. But no stress!

P/S: It is only 1.12PM and the day has been crazily beautiful. Just like the Man Upstairs. Looking forward to the rest of the day...without stress!

Uplifted

2011-03-14T23:34:00.005+08:00

The Day Before Yesterday
Jumped out of bed at an unearthly hour for the women's Bible study at 8AM. Came back to the apartment to welcome a dear friend back into LifeGroup. We rejoice in the Mighty One who, unsurprisingly, is working mightily in our lives. Once LifeGroup was over, I got started on the two vegetable dishes for dinner at a church member's place, during which his youngest daughter ate ice-cream with her bare hands. Man, if the adorableness of a child could slay... Post-dinner, we headed to campus for the Malaysian Night viewing party. The highlight of the night had been the insanely salty popcorn. And the highlight of the day had been the utmost precious letter from a terribly missed friend.

Yesterday
Woke up with too little sleep no thanks to daylight savings. Once I got back from church, I squeezed in some time for Math homework before leaving for the Lincoln Kids Against Hunger packing event with two coolsome friends. I had a rather decent and therapeutic time bagging the food with a team of seven other dudettes. What we were doing quickly became mechanical and the sound of each food item falling into the bag began to be rhythmic. It was two hours spent well. When we got back, we laboriously transferred all of the stuff from the balcony into the apartment for the remodeling of the balcony. The apartment now looks like a garage sale. After doing a whole ton of laundry, I went grocery shopping with three other fine dudettes, came back, cleared my room, set up my new Queen-sized bed with the much-needed aid of my apartmentmate, marveled at how much joy a new (and cyan-colored) bed could bring and blissfully drifted to sleep. The highlight of the day was video-chatting with yet another terribly missed friend back home.

Today
Left for classes after having the most incredible sleep ever. Then I had a lovely lunch with two awesome Malaysian Night buddies. On the way back, I spotted a black squirrel for the first time and got a little too excited for my own good. Oy. One of the two friends decided to tag along to the apartment since assignments this time of the semester were o'plenty and we needed to keep each other awake. We ended up talking a lot about the Man Upstairs whilst she shared her beautiful testimony with my apartmentmate and me. I decided to ask her to stay for dinner and made a couple of dishes with my apartmentmate, who is quite the chicken-chopper. I am very much stoked to cook and/or bake for dearly missed people back home. Highlight of the day? Chicken curry! For both lunch and dinner. Too much goodness in a day.

Tomorrow
A dude of the seventh-order will be arriving in good ol' Lincoln, Nebraska at night. I am as stressed out over preparing a simple welcome dinner and wishing for the weather to be kind on the day we plan to fly as I am with my upcoming speech and tests. I should probably just serve corn, corn, Cheetos and more corn. But I will not. Because we didn't get any corn on Sunday while grocery shopping. Quite a bummer.

So much to do, so little time but too much to praise God for!

Back to the books.

Chronology

2011-03-11T23:35:00.000+08:00

Today was a highly eventful day. I woke up this morning to participate in a survey regarding family and college as extra credit for my Communications class. The fifty-minute long interview ended up being only twenty-minutes long because of all the speed-talking which took place between the interviewer and me. Oy.

Then I read a very beautiful email by a dear friend and grinned like a loony for the longest time. Words from the heart are very precious...and sometimes absurd, too. Haw haw.

Just before heading off to lunch with two hip dudettes, I received a text about a possible bomb threat at one of the buildings on campus. The threat was lifted shortly after that. Freaky.

Post-lunch, we headed to the bookstore to chill...and chill some more. Then night fell and a dinner of rice and three dishes was whipped up within thirty minutes by my very skilled apartmentmate and the unskilled yours truly. Since we were rushing to continue with plans for the night, we finished our gigantic plate of dinner in ten minutes...which explains why my tummy is feeling rather peculiar at the moment.

Post-dinner, I spoke to my mother on Skype and discovered a very cool fact about my brother attending church every Sunday now. Yeah man.

Post-Skype conversation, my apartmentmate and I left for church and prayed with the rest of our brothers and sisters in Christ for three hours around a bonfire. The heat had almost set my butt aflame but the warmth from both the fire and the presence of God's family was incredible. God is awesome.

"I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." -Phillipians 4:13

Nuthin' Much

2011-03-10T23:11:00.001+08:00

Today, I woke up to a very lovely artwork by my very loving apartmentmate-slash-guardian. And a very important text message from a very important friend back home which made my heart full.

Today, I met up with two awesome friends for a wonderful chat about the Man Upstairs over a filling beverage of chocolate smoothie with blended strawberries and bananas. And then I met up with four other equally awesome people after that for a wonderful chat over garlic bread about the Malay language, Spring break plans and green beans.

Today, my quirky Math professor told the class that he had "screwed up" his Arithmetic back in the day. Hmm.

Today, the last of the green beans is no more.

Today, God showed me His love. And it looks pretty flippin' amazing. Feels pretty flippin' amazing, too.

P/S: I clearly need to read more. My over-usage of adjectives is driving me nuts. Please forgive me.

Rock on Fire

2011-03-10T07:34:00.004+08:00

A couple of friends and I have been consuming a lot of green beans lately because I had brought an entire tray of green beans back from the balance of food left over from Malaysian Night last weekend. Green beans in my rice, green beans in my noodles, green beans on my empty plate. Good stuff! No, really.

All of yesterday and today, I was able to get done a few things I had been meaning to do. I was, however, unable to attend both my morning and only classes today because I had woken up to discover that one had already ended and one was just beginning. And the thought which ran through my head just a second before I had opened my eyes was, "Wow, this five minutes of snooze is pretty satisfying and long." Oy. Uncool.

Besides waking up to missed classes, I had also woken up with a very hungry tummy and the sight of an incredible friend's M&M cookies which, when enlarged, makes the mouth water.

I am very much looking forward to returning home for the summer. God's hands are moving and there is much to live for.

!!!

2011-03-07T23:43:00.000+08:00

There is a time for everything,
a season for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to rebuild.
A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to lose.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak up.
A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.

-Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

P/S: So there is also a time for the new Queen-sized mattress to arrive in all its white splendor.

PP/S: And a time to dust myself off and start again.

PP/S: God is as real as real gets!!! (Level-o'-excitement: 23.8/10!!!)

Huzzah!

2011-03-06T23:51:00.002+08:00

Just poppin' in:

Malaysian Night 2011 was quite the bomb.

My lovely apartmentmate spent more time working on how I looked for the night than she did on herself.

The new faces at church today were a delight.

Lunch was absolutely incredible in the great company of phenomenal friends...and phenomenal food.

Clean-up at the event venue was filled with lots of epic prop-destroying action.

The online test went much better than I had expected it to.

Japanese buffet in the city with the committee in celebration of the night's success was simply splendid.

Received many folds of grace today, as I do every other day.

All glory to the Man Upstairs.

Soli Deo Gloria

2011-03-04T23:32:00.003+08:00

Today, I woke up with twelve hours of sleep. And spent the next twelve doing my small part for Malaysian Night. Four-hundred-and-fifty copies of the booklets were finally printed and I actually sprinted for the Copy Center. I know many will leave their respective booklets on the tables not caring about it at all, but I do. And I know God does. So all will be well. I am excited for tomorrow to come to pass!

Today, the President (of NUMSA) and I went on a little roadtrip with the very patient VIPs in the back seat as we drove past the hotel and saw the highway stretch out in front of us. I don't know about them, but I had a pretty brilliant time riding shotgun and getting to know all of them a little bit better. I hadn't known how madly in love the President is with frisbee. Nor had I known how understanding the two VIPs were as we had sort of disappointed them one too many times from the minute they touched down at the airport. Aiyaya.

Today, the Head of the volunteers decided to give me the first NUMSA T-shirt out of the box and told me he was to be the last to take one for himself as his priority was to everyone else first. I was immediately reminded of my mother, who always tells me to do the same thing. And so my heart swelled with pride for said friend. He is pretty awesome. And I had only discovered yesterday that he lives where I live back in Malaysia. Oy!

Today, a most precious soul halfway around the world leaves teenagedom and takes her first step into adulthood. The most blessed and fantastic 20th birthday to her. As the both of us approach yet another challenging stage in life, I pray that we will continue to keep the friendship burning for God. Because if there is one thing I know for certain that I can bring with me with each passing year, it is this friendship. I have been bringing it with me for fifteen years now. I will continue to do so for as long as I am breathing. She is definitely one for keeps, and I am immensely thankful for such a friend in my life. Praise God for the all-things-adorable- and Winnie-the-Pooh-lover.

Today, I was pretty unlovable and plenty annoying in a million different ways. Yet God loves me still. My heart is at peace.

T-17 hours 'til the Big Malaysian Event. Yeah man.

Better Day

2011-03-03T21:00:00.001+08:00

I am spent, yet overjoyed. I am spent for so many reasons, but overjoyed for so many more...as I will list below:

1. I had my cousin sister and brother for virtual company at the other ends of the globe as I stayed up until 6AM the night before last whilst Googling mouth-watering pictures of Malaysian food to complete the largest chunk of the booklet. Praise God for family.

2. It had felt incredible holding the booklet physically at long last. A lot of people had given a lot of themselves in the making of this booklet and I am immensely thankful. God is good.

3. My Geology professor from last semester had taken time out of his schedule to meet up with me to discuss the possibilities of an undergraduate research or a head start on a senior thesis for me. I honestly don't know what the future holds as I continue to pursue my degree in Geology. But I am trusting God to provide the best He has in store for me.

4. Three beautiful friends had called/woken me up this morning to make sure I would make it to my Differential Equations exam today. So wonderfully blessed by the Man Upstairs.

5. A friend's hilarious remark when I had told him what traditional costume I was going to wear for Malaysian Night 2011 made my night, regardless of whether he was being serious or not. I had been receiving very strong objections from two dear friends over said costume because, quite honestly, it is a little bit...sparkly. So it was only natural for me to laugh like a loony when he said, "I like it! It's very Vogue." But against our better judgment, I shall trust his judgment. And look my best for God...as well as figure out how to desparkle the costume.

6. A very dear friend's insanely shocking (and insanely funny) question posed to me had also made my night. What a question! Haw haw. Haw.

7. It is 9PM. Time to crash!

"Better days are on their way. God promises." -Joyce Meyer in Enjoying Everyday Life

F-D-P

2011-03-01T23:47:00.002+08:00

Today, I finished the poem over lunch and a little bit of Math class. Oy. And yay!

And then I did a bit of unwise guessing for my Geology rock identification quiz. Double oy.

And now I am stressing out big-time over the booklet which is almost kinda sorta nearly done...but not quite. In short, the booklet is not done for printing on Thursday morning. The progress of my revision for the Math exam on that same day hasn't budged from 0.00% as well. But no matter. Because I had really good food today.

Freak out!

Dance.

Party.

(sun)

2011-02-28T23:33:00.000+08:00

Today, my Communications professor showed us a very nifty and brilliant video on conviction in speech. Upon feeling convicted, I went home more determined than ever to get started on the poem I had been planning to write for a very precious soul here in Lincoln who just happened to give me a mini fashion show ten minutes ago in anticipation for the upcoming (and dreaded) Malaysian Night this Saturday. After five minutes of laborious brainstorming, I saw that I had only come up with one line and several words at different ends of the paper. And then I decided that my brain needed a rest from the angst of poetry-writing. I will come up with another line tomorrow. (Hopefully more but I better not make any promises lest I fail myself.)

Twice did I nearly break my week-long fast from Facebook today. Seeing as how I am itching to get back on Facebook the minute Wednesday morning arrives, I think it is best that I refrain from throwing away my time and prolong this fast...until Saturday! Ten days. It is going to be one of my life's greatest challenges. But I can do it. I mean, I hope, like, I can do it, y'know?

Besides having my head pervaded with thoughts on the awesomeness of language, poetic stress and the pains of Facebook deprivation, I also spent the better half of the day slaving for the booklet for Malaysian Night. It is now only 100% (divided by four) done. This is the result of possessing superb procrastinating skills...and zero designing skills.

It is now thirty minutes away from March 2011 and my plans for the night include listening to the sermon my apartmentmate and I had only listened to halfway few days ago...and memorizing volcanic and granitic rocks for tomorrow's Geology lab quiz.

Looking forward to my sleep tonight even though it would be a very short one. And looking forward to the rising sun tomorrow.

Like, over and out?

Peepol

2011-02-27T23:50:00.008+08:00

Lesson learned today (a little bit too delayed, if you ask me...or a lot too delayed): People are important.

As important as the color blue in the sky.

As important as words are in a book.

As important as the act of being there.

As important as the five human senses.

As important as the invention of wheels.

As important as zappers in the quest to exterminate mosquitoes.

As important as sambal in a meal of nasi lemak.

As important as the pineapple under the sea.

Well...you catch my drift.

People are important. Immensely important.

Shout-out to the important people I spoke to today: Mother, father, brother, cousin sister, aunt, uncle, apartmentmate, high school friends, college friends and university friends. All within a day. My soul is refreshed.

P/S: Apologies for such cheesiness. I am not quite sure what to do with myself. Oy!

The Gentleman

2011-02-26T17:32:00.007+08:00

To one of the dearest gentlemen in my life,

Although this is a message only meant for you, I want to do this publicly on my blog -though who still reads this upon its 723rd death is beyond me- because I find no reason in hiding this but rejoicing in it.

I don't even know where to begin because there is so much I want to say. But I guess like in every situation, you deliver the bad news first, and then the good news. So the bad news is this: I have changed yet again in the past few weeks. I am no longer the Justine you know (Justine 3.0) after the Justine you knew earlier (Justine 2.0) was gone. I am now Justine 4.0. And before you start howling with laughter -which you are probably already doing- I want to deliver the good news next.

The good news is this: I am liking this Justine 4.0 very much, and I think you might like this Justine, too. I don't want to launch into a string of apologies because both you and I know that I have said it one too many times and no matter how truly sorry I was, I couldn't show it. What I want to do is thank you, something that both you and I also know that I do too much. But with this unplanned post, I express my implicit gratitude.

Thank you for your trust in me. It means more than you know and rest assured that I am safeguarding it with great care. I know I said that I trust you less the minute you made one small mistake you hadn't intended to, and I really did trust you less at the time. It was my mistake to have placed so much weightage in that one tiny detail and it wasn't fair that I was being hard on you. But know now that my trust in you has been fully restored; and it isn't just 100% now, but 531.96%. Which is an all-time high, by the way. Har har. It will remain that way for a long time to come.

Thank you for your grace. For each time I gave you hell, you made an attempt to bring me undiluted joy. Just as I know I gave you hell numerous times, I also know you strived to direct happiness my way at every opportunity you got...and are still doing so. (Though I hope I have stopped giving you hell...I have stopped, yes? Say yes! Oh man...) Thank you for choosing to overlook and see past all my flaws and wrongdoings to see the very best in me. If I saw myself through your eyes, I think I would have been the most big-headed person in the known Universe.

Thank you for your patience. You said you would give me all the time and space I needed even if it would take years. How long has it been? A year, I reckon? Thank you for not pushing it any further and finally backing off for my sake. I suspect it must have been a very hard thing to do at the time and if it was, I thank you for doing so for this friendship. I had all the time and space I needed. Thank you for waiting even though you may have expected me not to return at all.

Thank you for your care. They always say mother knows best. Indeed, my mother does know best. Right from the very beginning, she had told me that you were and always will be a true friend to me and that you will be there for me no matter what. And really, I know you will be there for me no matter what. I hear it in your speech, I read it in your words, I see it in your actions. They all match perfectly and I have zero doubts about your sincerity. Thank you for placing my best interests above yours most times.

Thank you for your friendship. I mentioned in one of my age-old emails to you that a friend is a friend and that there is no difference in level and depth among all the friendships one has. Which, I admit now, is total bullcrap. Thank you for being the smarter one and already refuting that statement at the time. I have many rocks in my life, not just literal geological rocks, but people whom I stand and count on. You are one of the most precious ones in my lifetime. Solid, rare, naturally-refined, resistant to weathering, shines brilliantly when exposed to light and...cyan in color. Just the best of qualities. And you possess them all, whether you see it or not. And if you don't like cyan, it's just too bad!

I look forward to your insanely short visit here. And believe me when I say that I am madly, completely, unbelievably and overwhelmingly excited to fly, and to be doing this with you. Because if I could choose to fly with anyone, it would be with you -the friend who has seen this dream of mine ignite and invested in it more than I ever did. Although we won't actually be able to fly together as in co-piloting the aircraft or fly in the air simultaneously, we will experience this same extraordinary feeling of soaring in the sky together. And this will be one of our many greatest and fondest memories in our Book of Friendship.

Ikhsan, I will see you soon.

P/S: If you are uncomfortable with your name being mentioned even though nobody who doesn't already know what happened would be reading this -nay, I think nobody would even be reading this- then send me a text/message in 0.02 seconds after reading this. And I will remove it...when I am back on my laptop, if I am not on it already. Haw haw haw. If you send it after 0.02 seconds have passed, which it probably already did by now...I will remove it anyhow. Or change it to 'Mr. Zzzz'. Be blown away by my sheer kindness!

Grinning widely next to my awesome friend. SpongeBob, I mean.

Snow!

2010-11-12T23:29:00.000+08:00

Yep. That's it.

Time for November

2010-11-07T23:46:00.000+08:00

Haven't been making the best decisions lately. Clearly, something colossal is missing in my life right now. Or rather, Someone colossal. As much as I would want to mention about what I had foolishly done tonight, Future Justine wouldn't be too happy reading about it a few years down the road. So I am going to do away with the bad times and focus on the good times...which include:-

1. Buying a frying pan! I am proud of myself.
2. Successfully making French toast...with the aid of YouTube videos.
3. Skyping with three dearly missed friends from college in succession.
4. Feasting on heavenly nasi lemak yet again in the company of great friends.
5. Getting an extra hour of sleep thanks to Daylight Savings.
6. Having my awesome apartmentmate curl my hair for the fun of it. On second thought, it may be hovering between a good time and a bad time.
7. Being blessed by the sermon in church.
8. Lovely weather...which will hopefully stay lovely.
9. Receiving little messages from family and friends back home.
10. Ice-cream!

In dire need of new brain cells.

Ohana

2010-10-29T21:37:00.003+08:00

Today, the sun was out, my Geology professor handed out candies for Halloween, History class ended extra early, some friends and I visited the mall, I successfully fried eggs for the first time as well as made dinner and had delicious hot chocolate in the presence of good friends. Life is great over at this end.

Missing quite a number of people immensely though. Especially the one I spoke to for over an hour last night who has a heart of pure gold and never fails to teach me the value of selflessness and sheer optimism. More notes to self!

Peekaboo

2010-10-26T23:20:00.001+08:00

Texas.

Moving out of the dorm.

Memorizing rocks and minerals.

Been keeping busy!

God is good!

J is for Joy

2010-10-14T23:44:00.001+08:00

Over the past few days, I have:

1. Strained to identify rocks of campus buildings for a Geology pre-lab assignment (and failed to identify them). Fun!
2. Realized that the chirpy worker at the dining hall is the only one who calls me 'lady'. As in, "Good day, lady!" Made my morning.
3. Relished Subway's exceptionally scrumptious white choc-chip macadamia cookies. So fine.
4. Missed a free concert right outside my dorm due to an upcoming Geology quiz and History mid-term. Pshaw.
5. Found utter peace, not for the first time, in the laundry room at the basement. That place is a haven.
6. Delighted in an unusually terse email by a dearly missed friend. Incredible how an emboldened and yellow-fonted HI!!!!! can induce so much joy. That, and a smiley.
7. Sweated bullets over an English mid-term. Aiyaya.
8. Experienced the brutality of the cold. Without the snow. Yet.
9. Packed for my Texas trip tomorrow. Yeah man.
10. Been so wonderfully blessed.

Life is good. Cheers to the Man Upstairs.

Looking Up

2010-10-11T23:59:00.006+08:00

Today, I had "one of those days". I want to rant tirelessly, most of which has to do with my upcoming History midterm, but then I realize with shame that there is much I can thank God for. So I am going to do the latter.

I thank God for:-

1. Waking me up in time for Geology class. I was standing outside the lecture theater, with the rest who were waiting to enter, for the first time in weeks. Not that I am late every other time. I just happen to have ten minutes to spare after hitting the Snooze button multiple times. That, or the Off button.

2. The lovely weather today. It was neither too hot nor too cold and with how the weather has been lately, this is reason enough to rejoice in Him.

3. The short but satisfying nap I was able to take in between classes. Again, I made it to History class by strolling and not sprinting.

4. Ice-cream! Filled with chunks of cookie dough!

5. A gracious friend who granted me permission to print papers which needed to be printed using said friend's printing account. A huge load was lifted off my shoulders the second the last paper was freshly churned out by the printer.

6. Having yet another friend who actually wanted my opinion on something art-related and valued it enough to go with what I preferred. Despite my mentioning how atrociously terrible I am at anything crafty or artsy. Oy.

7. Just the friendliest general education adviser! I have heard many horrific stories of students being assigned uncool advisers. We spent forty solid minutes going over my degree audit and other semester shenanigans; me shooting out question after question, she answering every single one of them without smacking me in the face once. Her patience astounds me.

8. Compelling me to tell my adviser that I was thinking of Minoring in Math because equations are very much missing in my life right now and they are dearly missed. The first thing she did when I said that was smile at me so widely that I thought I had accidentally blurted out that I was craving for Japanese food instead of what I had intended to say. Then she said that I might have already obtained the Math Minor since I had completed all the required Math courses for my major here. My shock was short-lived when she inspected a sheet of paper and told me that I had two more Math courses to go and the Minor would be good to go. Sweetness.

9. A text message from my mother when I took my second nap of the day. In it contained gentle and loving reminders that I am never carrying all the weight on my own. In fact, I think the Man Upstairs is carrying 99.91% of the weight in my life I always seem to complain about, and I am left with the almost weightless 0.09%. And thus begins my attempt to stop kvetching, for the 328419th time.

10. Family and friends who care and light up my life on a daily basis. It never fails to amaze me how much joy I can always get just by exchanging a sentence or two with someone cherished. Absence makes the heart ache like a knife stabbed to the chest. Repeatedly. It is not too pleasant a feeling. Thankfully, though, they are more present than absent. I am at peace...despite nursing a pseudo-wound. Begone, knife in the chest!

The end of The One-of-those-days Saga begins now. Tomorrow will great! God is always good!

Off to munch on bread! At 3.30AM!

An Abudance of Tens

2010-10-10T22:41:00.004+08:00

Surprisingly, the days here have been getting increasingly eventful. The coming week is going to be my most hectic week yet. Or rather, my first hectic week here. Oy. Naturally, my urge to blog culminates at a time when my to-do list is at its longest. Double oy. Today is 10/10/10. So with that, I shall post about the past 10 days of my life here. You are advised to stop reading once you hit Day 2.

Friday, Day 1 - Attended Moon-Raya, an event celebrating two Malaysian occasions. Since I was part of the organizing committee, I was granted the prestigious job of scooping peanuts onto people's plates. It was gratifying to be of service to people's plates...but not as gratifying as eating the nasi lemak. The Epic Album had also arrived on this day. Listening to it for the first time -and 375th time now- was and still is momentous.

Saturday, Day 2 - Went for the Geology field trip at a park located an hour away from campus. Vacillated between much-needed sleep and utmost dread the entire ride there. Much to my labmate and my relief, the actual field trip once we got there had only taken 45 minutes and not 4 hours as listed in the course syllabus. Yeah man. Feeling equally euphoric and all sorts of joy because we were finally done with it, my labmate who had sat beside me on the bus and I chatted the entire ride home about the awesomeness of languages and unforgotten dreams of setting our feet in different places around the world. And about fish.

Sunday, Day 3 - Unknowingly left my brain back in the dorm when I went to church and had hot chocolate spill all over my shirt because I was holding a ton of stuff. And that is all I am going to say about this catastrophe. Post-church, a few friends and I had Chinese buffet for lunch which was awesome on so many levels; perhaps not so much the food, but the idea of Chinese buffet itself.

Monday, Day 4 - Took the bus to the mall with a friend. Spent several hours there and was at one point surrounded by way too many guns and crossbows for my own sanity. Post-dinner, I got assaulted by said friend who lifted me up into the air out of the blue. My mind hadn't been able to compute the data feed as a result of that and didn't give me a response I direly needed. So I have not responded to the wordless situation. Yet.

Tuesday, Day 5 - Woke up to a text message, sent by my cousin brother, informing me that my birthday package to him -sent a little over a week ago- had arrived. Then the day got even better when my cousin sister informed me that her birthday package -sent almost two months ago- had also finally arrived. Coincidentally, I had just visited the bookstore's post office that morning to rant about a possible missing package and was also about to file a complaint. Thank goodness I hadn't. I was a happy dudette that day.

Wednesday, Day 6 - Went for the NUMSA (Nebraska University Malaysian Student Association) meeting and had the toughest time yet keeping minutes because an hour-long discussion had ensued on Malaysian food. A minimum of three people had also been talking simultaneously at any given moment. The bag of chips which was passed around was the only thing keeping me sane.

Thursday, Day 7 - Walked into Geology lab to discover that the lab TA had hacked off his very cool ponytail for job interviews. He hadn't looked too shaken up about his ponytail no longer being a part of him, but I am positive that he had felt as despondent about it just as I had. The poor ponytail. I was also fooled into lifting my left arm for thirty minutes on this day. My stupidity amazes me every single time. Another highlight of the day was visiting the Japanese eatery! Not to eat but to check out the menu. A tad bit too expensive, I must say. But they have all the key Japanese dishes which my tummy yearneth for.

Friday, Day 8 - Observed a friend-cum-chef make sambal -the most essential ingredient in a nasi lemak- and authentic Indian chicken curry. I think I kind of know how to make sambal now...but I need to learn how to use the stove first. But other than that, I think I am on my way to being a professional sambal-maker. Cue tears of laughter.

Saturday, Day 9 - Had lovely Malaysian and American food at a church member's nifty place. Was enjoying myself for the most part until the American board game called Quelf was whipped out from the abyss of death and the horror began. The pain I had gone through was and still is unfathomable.

Sunday, Day 10 - This morning, I was blessed by the message shared in church. Then evening came, and it was time for the mini-gathering involving homemade Chinese food. I made the wrong move by deciding to nap an hour before the gathering and almost missed out on mouthwatering chicken rice and chicken curry if it hadn't been for a friend who kept calling for me to go. And thank goodness I went. Delicious!

I suppose when I said eventful, I may have meant food-filled. Next week is going to be brutal...especially the first half of Friday when I have a Geology quiz, History midterm and English midterm back-to-back. And then a plane to catch to Texas. Haw haw.

[Note: The moment of 10.10PM of 10/10/10 passed by as I was typing this post. Psh.]

The Other Side of Down*

2010-09-27T10:35:00.000+08:00

Amidst all the kvetching, stressing and moping, amazing things have happened. And since my blogging juice supply is at an all-time low now, I am resorting to posting in parts yet again. Forgive me.

Part One - Had my first Geology exam today in which there were 63 questions to be answered in 50 minutes. How amazing...ly uncool.

Part Two - Received a marvelous package from the cousin sisters. In it were an excellent miniature model of my bedroom back home and a personalized Zhoo-Steen bag stuffed with plane- and SpongeBob-related items. I was rendered speechless and still am every time I stare at them with utmost wonder and joy.

Part Three - Turned 19 in the presence of fabulous food and incredible friends. Almost couldn't believe my eyes -and nose- after I was let out of the room I was trapped in for what felt like hours. The home-cooked nasi lemak was, needless to say, the most satiable meal I have ever had since setting foot on American soil. My frenzied dreams involving nasi lemak can lay to rest now.

Part Four - Life here has been improving tremendously thanks to two dear friends who make everyday a day to look forward to. My roommate has also been sharing my dreaded thoughts about the food at the dining hall. Family and friends back home have been making the effort to keep up with what has been going on over at this end. Cousin sisters have been wonderfully and delightfully thoughtful. There is much to be happy about.

Part Five - I fear that this blog loathes me as much as I loathe myself for abandoning it so often. My non-existent blogging skills have become even more non-existent and I hang my head in shame. I think it must be the whole wheat bread I have been having. That, or the baby carrots.

End of ridiculously pointless post.

*Befitting title of post borrowed from title of new album by The Artist.

N to the L

2010-09-09T21:54:00.000+08:00

The United States of America has engulfed me.

Well, that, and numerous other things. Future Justine has been invading the crevices of my mind, demanding that I update this almost-forgotten blog. So here I am doing so, with much guilt and shame.

Since leaving the Beautiful Land of Nasi Lemak, I have:

1. Realized that I have never pronounced my name correctly all this while, Americans cannot understand me more than half the time because of my accent -cue gasp- and Malaysian food is to die for.

2. Left my roommate (unwillingly) for another residence hall only to be left by the new roommate. And now I have a new roommate who left her roommate (willingly). Very complex, see.

3. Visited a splendid supermarket and an outdoor mall. Multiple times.

4. Moped over the non-existence of authentic Asian food...and the overbearing existence of American (shocker!) and Italian food.

5. Held meteorites! Eaten ice-cream as meal replacements! Bought books! Completed a series of secret missions! Wept! Gone ice-blocking! Tried Nutter Butters! Done laundry on my own! Seen USAF officers!

6. Grieved over my brother's departure back to Malaysia to eat nasi lemak, my not being there to celebrate my cousin sister's 19th birthday and food outlets being closed during times I desperately needed them most.

7. Seen God in both the little and big things. Glorious.

It hasn't been easy. But it has been getting better with each day; my thoughts going from "I refuse to face the world -unless food or shower beckons..." to "Will I be having nasi lemak today? How 'bout tomorrow? The next day perhaps? The day after that maybe? Or the day after that day?" I only long for nasi lemak now. And I know that even though the day is not nigh, it will come eventually. So it's all good now.

Here

2010-08-14T09:29:00.000+08:00

I have reached Nebraska. Jehovah Jireh.

And that is all the update I have for now. Haw haw haw. Too many thoughts and too many emotions within me. Feeling overjoyed and saddened. Feeling tired and charged up. I am a confused soul roaming the States.

Until the next one!

This Is It

2010-08-12T15:33:00.000+08:00

Today, I will be leaving Malaysia for the United States of America to study.

Yeah man.

Just Like Heaven

2010-08-07T23:14:00.000+08:00

Today was such a glorious day. High school friends and family. Just the loveliest combination of the best company one could ever ask for.

My heart is so full. And my tummy, too. God is...heavenly.

May the good times roll.

Cloud Ten

2010-08-06T22:54:00.005+08:00

I am, at this moment, feeling nostalgic, overwhelmed and gratified. All thanks to a one-hour mamak session with high school friends I hadn't caught up with in eons. I kick myself now wondering why I hadn't done this any earlier. It goes without saying that I had a superbly great time doing absolutely nothing but chatting with friends over Malaysian food. The ease and joy I had felt didn't have many precedents. I have always missed high school...but boy am I missing high school more than ever now! What I would give just to be in that blue uniform for just one more day. But that chapter of my life has long been neatly closed. And will remain a favorite in my book of Adolescence.

The mini-gathering tonight made my week and it crushed my liver when I had to leave all-too-soon for a family dinner. But the weekend is nigh and I am looking forward to hopefully meeting these awesome people yet again! And a bunch of other equally awesome people. Heehee.

So blessed. Too blessed. What an incredibly amazing God who is in control of my life.

Ah, such absolute bliss.

Blogorrhea

2010-08-05T23:24:00.003+08:00

Haven't had peace of mind in days. I don't know if it's the jitters or the anxiety or the madness or a combination of the three, but my head is quite an uncool place to dwell in at the moment. The transition to the United States doesn't seem to be going as I had it planned eons ago. But as of two seconds ago, I have decided that I have no reason whatsoever to be kvetching. This is going to be quite an adventure!

Besides trying to hit the mental brakes and seeing the darkness in every lighted, uh, area, I have been and will still be catching up with a whole bunch of people who power up my life like a 500-megawatt solar plant. I have also been embarking on mini-adventures with my family, cousins and friends -in preparation for the biggest adventure yet, perhaps. Life has been great, God has been ever-present and I am slowly beginning to feel mushy so I shall stop short on this note.

On another note, however, the preparations to the U.S. of A have been driving me up the wall. I don't mind having to call the university every now and then and speak to five different offices to get my questions answered; I don't mind stuffing myself with Malaysian food to face the complete lack of it over there; I don't mind making checklists and ensuring that things go as planned. But it's the immensely time-consuming packing that makes me want to pull every single strand of my hair out -with extensions or not. I made a little bit of progress today by sorting out the clothes I intend to bring there in one of the luggage bags. But that is about all I've done and I am not looking forward to the rest of the 95.72% of packing.

On yet another note, I am going to be having a Nebraskan roommate because the single room I requested for at the university's residence hall ran out, I am assuming. She has quite a cool name and replies messages I send to her. I am both glad and relieved that we are getting off on the right foot. Stoked, as always!

Trusting the Man Upstairs to pave the way ahead.

P/S: I realize I am "but a mere diminished shadow" of Past Justine. Well, Present Justine can't help it!
PP/S: The most gigantic shout-out to the Yeo family, which has been too cute for words and overwhelmingly understanding. More so than I can ever be, and I am beyond grateful.
PPP/S: I have issues which have issues. No kidding.

"I Just Got My Hands on One of My Fav Mags!"

2010-08-01T22:07:00.000+08:00

January 14, 2006 - Saturday

I feel soooooooooo happy!!!!!!!!!!

Know why?? Because I just got to purchase Galaxie, the mag I've been craving for since January!!!!!!!! I've been to almost every magazine shop and its all sold out - even at major shops!!

Today, finally, as my dad stopped by a shop to buy something, I caught a glimpse of the word GAL-.. I went to the shop, getting my fingers crossed, and there it is!!!! Only 3 were left - 2 were badly damaged, the last 1 was the best - and I grabbed 1 and bought it straight away!! And I cant believe the price is only THREE dollars!! The mag is TWICE as thick as normal and they're selling at just the same price...!!

I am so lucky!!

The front cover is the super-cute hunk from Smallville, Tom Welling.. He's so cute!! Plus there are 68 posters in total!! Yippie!!

I probably wasnt honest.. Okay, I didnt buy it from a mag shop.. I got it from a GROCERY STORE.....!! Can you believe it??!! Who would've think of buying this fab mag in a grocery store???!! The last place on my mind of getting my hands on this mag was a grocery store, to be honest.. I mean, a grocery store??

Okay, enough yapping.. I got what I wanted..

Justine..

And this utmost humiliating post marks the end of Past Justine's online thoughts. Thank. Goodness.

"Aargh!! Frustation and Homework!!"

2010-07-31T20:10:00.000+08:00

January 12, 2006 - Thursday

Aargh!!!!! Everyday, I have the same routine over and over again.. Yes, the same!!

Everyday its school, homework, tuition, homework, school, homework, tuition, homework...............................

I mean, is it right to give us ample amount of homework just because this year (form3-PMR) we have major exams?? I dont think so...!! And its as if this exam will bring us to university, its the form 5 one, SPM.. Now, thats what I call MAJOR...

Friday is always the busiest day for me.. The worst day of the week!! Why? I'll tell you why!!

6.30am-get ready for school

12.45pm-reach home and rush to bathe and eat lunch in 45mins

2.00pm-at science tuition

4.00pm-from science tuition straight to english tuition

6.00pm-come home, eat dinner, prepare for bm tuition

10.00pm-come back from tuition, do homework, sleep

Now, do you get it???!!! I have THREE tuitions!!! THREE!!!!! Its sick I tell you.. Sick!!! And I cant even get to watch TV or surf the net..!

Aaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anger, frustration, lack of sleep, tuition, tuition, tuition, homework, homework, homework...!!!!! NOOOO!!!

Some days, I have huge bags under my eyes too..

I need more sleep!!

Too frustrated to type anymore, Justine.

Dedicated to G.E.H., who somehow gets a kick out of reading these humiliating past writings.

"My mom's Birthday!!"

2010-07-30T22:15:00.000+08:00

January 10, 2006 - Tuesday

It's my mom's birthday today!! Can you guess how many years old she is?? Nah, I bet you can't.. Well, she's 51.. I know she's a bit old but she is young at heart.. The way she dresses, she has a better sense of fashion than me.. That I must admit.. So anyway, she's a great mom.. A very GREAT one!!

I felt really guilty cos I didnt get her a present yet, but it's no biggie.. I'll let her choose what she really wants and then I'll pay for it.. I know, I'm mean and I shouldn't do that.. But I really had no time to go shop for her cos we were at home all the time.. OK, I'm kidding.. But where we went, there was nothing unique or special, so I couldn't get anything special for her..

I got her a pair of earrings for christmas though!! And its not even close to cheap, it costs 50 dollars..!!

Gotta go, bubbye!!

Lots of sharing, Justine.

Again, some throwing up involved in the making of this post.

2006

2010-07-26T21:00:00.001+08:00

Because I am way less interesting now than I was then, I shall post entries I had posted online when I was 14. Past Justine loved complaining just as much as I do now, though she was a little bit more pleasant and sweet. Huh. The following is the description to the online diary I had for about a week when I was fourteen, in all its smiley-faced and typo-filled glory:

Hey, my name is Justine. I just turnad 14 last September.. Started school a week ago.. Life in school was terrible! We(me and my fellow classmates) were given so much homework.. I don't think we are going to survive if this goes on, I mean, everyday we have to read, write, count, and even memorise facts!! Is that normal?? NO! Its torture, that's what it is!!

Okie dokie, gotta pen off now, cya!

Cheers, Justine..

I may have thrown up a little. Next up: First post in this mad diary.

Visa-ed and Bespectacled

2010-07-22T15:14:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I made a very bad move by accidentally napping for four hours straight. After picking my mother up from the airport at night, I was so wide awake despite my urgent need to get sufficient sleep for my Visa interview the next day (today). The same can be said for my brother. The both of us were up 'til about 4AM and had to wake up at 5.30AM this morning to head to the U.S. Embassy in the city. I spent the entire night willing myself to sleep -but to no avail- and trying not to fall off the chair with a smile on my face as I gazed at this:

My eyes water...with joy and pride.

This morning came five minutes -or what seemed like five minutes- after we finally dozed off and we left the house with barely enough sleep. At the embassy, we were terribly amused to find that security was madly tight. A butterfly probably ain't allowed to fly into the premises without going through two security checks first for fear that it may be carrying ammunition under its wings. Then, we were terribly unamused to find that the waiting process for the interview is probably one of the most boring and somniferous waits we have ever experienced -mainly because we needed sleep, and our cell phones were kept away with security. And my brother ran out of 'Knock Knock' and 'Yo Mama' jokes.

To cut the very long rant short, we both eventually walked out of there around noon time with approved Visas. Praise God, truly! I was feeling so frantic for my brother for so many reasons but God's grace was upon us. We are glad. And immensely relieved.

Post-U.S. Embassy, we went for lunch and met up with our mother so she could take us to get our eyesight checked. I, for one, was not looking forward to it. After many weeks of being in denial, the half-truth eventually was brought to light today and I am going to be bespectacled very soon. But the glasses would only be used for reading, driving and laptop-related purposes. Still. I plan to not wear them at all...though I don't know how long my spectacles strike can last. It is a truth I cannot accept. Yet. Woe is me. My brother, on the hand, has perfect vision despite using two laptops simultaneously every minute of every day for years. I reckon the books have betrayed me.

On a less depressing note, my cousin sister will be here in a few hours for the weekend getaway with my family. Good times await!

Titled

2010-07-20T23:32:00.004+08:00

Today, I:-

a) was out for 12 hours with my awesome cousin sister.
b) watched a mind-wrestling movie which made me question my current reality...for about two seconds.
c) had a frog from out of nowhere hop onto my toe for a nanosecond. Aiiee!
d) drove right into a curb -no thanks to my increasingly alarming night blindness- and panicked all the way until I parked at the petrol station to look at the damage which resulted from the ear-splitting BANG!
e) had my second minor accident in just two months.
f) shifted the gear into 'D' right after my cousin sister reminded me to shift it to 'R'; and then shifted it to 'P' so that we could laugh (at my epic stupidity) until our sides ached.
g) semi-accepted the fact that my eyes really need to be checked.
h) realized that it is not always best being alone in the car -like I had always dreamed it would be. Because it is certainly better to have a calm and optimistic person in the car preventing you from breathing into a paper bag at the moment of impact.
i) ate a wonderfully-Malaysian burger...which was unhealthy on so many levels but since I was/am already living...
j) thanked God for family.

Bon Day

2010-07-17T23:01:00.003+08:00

Today was an exhaustingly fun day. Exhausting because I drove a lot, got stuck in the jam a lot, walked a lot and sighed a lot. But fun because I got to spend it with a dear high school friend I hadn't met in eons, got to attend the annual Bon Odori Japanese festival for the first time, got to participate in the cultural dance which I got a huge kick out of but wherein I made a happy fool of myself, got to savor exquisite Japanese food and got to laugh and smile a ton. What I had thought would be a very gloomy day turned out to be an incredible one in which I had the time of my life -just with a word of prayer. I am in awe of God's abounding love.

In other news, I seem to be mentally and emotionally refreshed every day but physically tired no thanks to the strenuous activity I have been doing lately, which is watching movies back-to-back on my laptop. Oy. Also, the painfully awful need for me to drive at 10km/h on the highway earlier tonight because of the insane jam has made me spent. But not completely because I could still stay up for a movie. Now I'm completely spent.

Over and out.

Why I Should (Not) be a Class Valedictorian

2010-07-14T23:42:00.005+08:00

In points.

Point 1: My 1400-word speech ('Why I Should be a Class Valedictorian') was written in under an hour...and under great stress. It is not a title I want to be associated with. At all.

Point 2: My 1400-word speech was memorized in my sleep.

Point 3: My 1400-word speech was so ridiculously ridiculous that I saved it as 'ohplease.doc' on my laptop. Befitting.

Point 4: I planned to wear a pair of jeans and a T-shirt to the interview.

Point 5: I wore a skirt, a blouse and a pair of slippers in the end -after a bit of persuading from a friend. Though wearing the slippers had been my (smart) choice.

Point 6: The other three candidates who went for the interview were in formal wear from head to toe, complemented with sleek jackets.

Point 7: I had green streaks of hair -which they pointed out immediately, no thanks to the fact that I was standing perpendicular to the window where the sunlight brilliantly shone through.

Point 8: I had "no positions of leadership".

Point 9: I was a nervous wreck and slurred my entire speech.

Point 10: I had "a lot of self-doubt and why is that so?" Oops.

Point 11: A good friend read my speech and told me straightforwardly that my speech was "too humble" though I wholeheartedly disagree! Psh.

Point 12: There are already eleven points.

In my attempt to be more optimistic -I can see that I am very much succeeding at that- there were actually many parts about the interview which made it, much to my disbelief, fun. The panel of interviewers had been five Heads of Departments, three of whom were my lecturers, and two college counselors I had been bugging all of last semester. The Q&A session was surprisingly very casual and I answered each question lightheartedly and without much care. All of them had a question for me and I replied as honestly and coherently as I could. It was a pretty rewarding experience and although it is quite certain that my fear of speaking in public can rest for a while now, I have no regrets going for the interview and saying what I had to say. Besides, God gave me peace and comfort in that formidable room. And that felt pretty flippin' great.

P/S: I appreciated the moral support, rapid-fire advice and 'lucky' Oreo chocolate blend a dear friend thoughtfully gave me. I smile as I type this, but I refuse to type a smiley face...because this blog would be too weirded out if I did. But I am smiling!

Familiarity

2010-07-12T20:54:00.001+08:00

The very word itself brings me great comfort. Familiarity, to me, is waking up on the same bed surrounded by the same things in the same room of the same house with the very same people at the same street every single day for years. Familiarity, to me, is lolling in the same position on the same sofa in front of the same TV. Familiarity, to me, is reflexively gazing at the same angle and spotting just the same things at the same corners in the same home. Familiarity, to me, is punching in the same password on the same alarm and securing the same padlocks in the same manner on the same grilled door before leaving the house. Familiarity, to me, is walking to the same kitchen via the same hallway with food on the same table almost everyday...or maybe this is just laziness. Familiarity, to me, is living two minutes away from the same mamak food stalls, four minutes away from the same high school and six minutes away from the same good friends. Familiarity, to me, has been my last nineteen years on Earth.

It is quite a sad prospect to know that the familiarity which has been a part of me for the longest time will be stripped away soon. One more month of it will not suffice. I am already beginning to tear myself away from the galactically vast amount of things in my room which I cannot bring along with me. I am slowly detaching myself from the daily rituals I always perform thoughtlessly. And I am trying to brace myself for change.

'Change' is a word which brings me great discomfort. Change, to me, is having to first accept and then get used to an impossibly large number of new things: people, environment, lifestyle -the foundations of life itself. Change, to me, is being shoved out of the dearly loved comfort zone into an entirely new world of unfamiliarity and endless uncertainties. Change, to me, is waking up on a lovely day and realizing that you are no longer in the same circumstances and cannot share it with the same people anymore. Change, to me, is what I always look forward to but know without a doubt that I can crumble from at the drop of a hat. Change, to me, is another definition of fear.

So am I afraid of change? Like. A. Plucked. Chicken.

Truth be told, I am more afraid of change than I actually am of leaving. It's funny because I was never one who feared change. Or at least, I thought I was. It wasn't until college began that I learned something unfortunate about myself: I don't deal well with change. At all. A little over a month into college, 'change' thankfully morphed into 'familiarity' and I found comfort on so many levels with all things college. I am expecting the transition from college to university to be doubly harder than the one from high school to college -for many glaring and subtle reasons. But as afraid as I am, I will plunge ahead knowing with every fiber of my being that as unfamiliar as things may get, I have a very familiar God with me. And that is the one greatest thing about familiarity which I can always carry with me.

Self-pitiness aside, my brother and I have been busying ourselves by doing the necessary preparation for the States; me for education purposes and my brother for travel purposes. I also seem to be very cranky, impatient and irritable lately. Not that I haven't been cranky, impatient and irritable all my life. Oy. All this non-academic stress isn't boding too well with me.

Feels good to rant lengthily. It has been a while. I would rant further if I didn't have to get back to my to-do list. But I ain't kvetching. It is a privilege! I know that now. God is forever in control.

Commit your work to the LORD, and then your plans will succeed. -Proverbs 16:3

Plans Abound

2010-07-11T23:37:00.002+08:00

Since the last time I blogged, I have go-karted, scoured certain parts of KL city, had delicious nuggets, taken the cable car, chatted with my mother online, filled up many forms, mourned over the death of my completely soaked phone which turned out to be temporary, rejoiced over its sheer power to still function as per normal despite being underwater for more than five minutes, made plans, stressed out, made more plans, stressed out even more, surrendered.

Exactly a month away from bidding goodbye to Malaysia and greeting the United States hello.

Graduation

2010-07-06T23:57:00.001+08:00

Today, I attended my brother's graduation at a fancy hotel in the heart of the city. I am proud of that dude. We also took a family portrait by a professional photographer with the famous bookshelf background. Today was mentally tiring. Goodnight.

The proud Yeo family.

Jehovah-jireh

2010-07-05T23:17:00.001+08:00

Today started off terribly and ended splendidly. I had many plans for the day and kick-started it by driving to college to meet the counselor so that my many questions can be answered. After that was done, I dejectedly walked to the church office two blocks away to inform the pastors that my internship is now a no-go based on the many answers I received earlier from the counselor. Unfortunately, Monday was their day off. So I left a message.

Thirty minutes had barely passed since I arrived in college when I walked back to the car and saw a piece of white paper gloriously flapping on my windshield; it was a parking fine. I freaked out momentarily before I made several calls which further freaked me out. Because driving alone to an unknown place to pay the fine was definitely not part of the plan. After a few assuring words from a few awesome people, I decided to pay the fine later this week. End of Worry #1.

Worry #2 began when I realized I didn't know how to get to my cousin sister's place from college. With my brilliantly clueless driving, I ended up on the opposite side of the highway. Lovely. After edging closer and closer to my home, I finally managed to take the U-turn to get to the correct side of the highway. It was not fun. At all.

The plan resumed when my cousin sister and I arrived in the city in gleeful anticipation of the mini-trip to Petrosains; something we've been aiming to do since The Cousin List was conjured. Our hopes were mercilessly dashed, bludgeoned, smashed and obliterated when we discovered that the entrance looked deserted not because it was a weekday, but because it was closed on Mondays. Picture us stomping our feet and ripping our hair out here. Mentally. It was a devastating moment.

After thirty seconds of sadness, we consulted The Cousin List and zoomed to another mall with renewed hope. This time, we were not disappointed. We did some really precious things together and I had an awesome time with my very awesome cousin sister. She rocks big-time...even though she forced me to down a piece of sashimi for the first time today. I can't wait to cancel off more items on the list with her in the remaining weeks!

Tomorrow: Brother's graduation. Interesting.

P/S: Something is going on right now...and as much as I don't want to admit this, I am so afraid of what's to come. But God told my family and me not to worry about tomorrow. So we won't.

The Week

2010-07-03T21:05:00.001+08:00

This week has been filled with some of the best things in life: birthdays, Internet-deprivation, mall-hopping, high school friends, college friends, cousins, cheap books, movies, a theme park, prawn crackers, a fantastic new song by The Artist, good times, first times, family and a loving God.

And then some of the worst. But more of the best.

What. A. Week.

Hmm.

Prelude to the Awesome Week

2010-06-30T23:06:00.000+08:00

A litany of fantastic events have been filling my calendar all week and since I am now on a crunch-time with an essay I have to write for an interview tomorrow, I shall post a very lengthy and somniferous post on Saturday or Sunday night. Either that, or a really short post with the terse but no less true statement: "What. A. Week."

What an amazing Man who's watching over me from above. Thank You.

Grace-filled Day

2010-06-27T23:20:00.004+08:00

Today was an ordinarily good day. I had a fantastic time in church and made some decisions which scared me silly. But God has been pounding on my conscience for the longest time -say, several years now- and I cannot afford to ignore it anymore. So I did what I did. And I am still as fearful as ever. Oy. But I've got a feeling that they won't be decisions I am going to regret making. Not now and not ever. I have faith; not much, but enough.

After church, I came home to a very delicious meal for lunch. Then I sat by the laptop and watched two movies I've been wanting to watch back-to-back. Oh the joy! I would have already watched the third movie of the day if my fingers hadn't betrayed me and clicked on the 'Delete' button by accident. A very bad virtual accident, it was. Psh!

Before I knew it, night fell and I got stoked again for tomorrow. Five theme parks, five friends and one giant G-force ball. I sure hope the last one comes to pass. Because I am madly charged up for the moment I get to rapidly launch myself into the air, leaving the ground behind me and hurtling towards the sky. What. A. Feeling.

Now all I need to do in preparation is pack a spare change of clothes, a towel, soap and shampoo (possibly) and a plastic bag for the drenched clothes. Feels oddly like I'm going for a one-day camping trip. Oy.

Have I mentioned how much I am looking forward to tomorrow? No, I don't think I have. I am very much looking forward to tomorrow!

Generic Blog Post #32781

2010-06-26T23:59:00.002+08:00

Today, I went to the mall with a good high school friend for a movie I wasn't looking forward to. The movie turned out to be pretty awesome. Much to our pleasant surprise, we bumped into yet another dear high school friend we hadn't seen in ages at the bookstore and we got to have a very fruitful dinner together. I had a great day and am very amped up for next week! And I shall stop now because I am boring myself to death with overbearing happiness. Oy. Back to reading now... Double oy.

No Complaints

2010-06-24T23:11:00.003+08:00

Today, I met up with the best friend and two other high school friends for lunch at the eatery located opposite our high school, tried to enter high school, saw my friend's insanely cute younger brother for the first time in years, made really exciting plans with them for next week, exterminated seven cockroaches, napped in the evening and read a book. I don't think my day could have gotten any better. I seem to be riding on a happy wave lately and it is freaking me out because I haven't been complaining much and it is staring to get boring. Ha-ha! Just kidding. Life is good. God is good. I am good.